[meaning]

love has a reason
there's a meaning to the world


-gavin degraw


[chariot]


some days i despise children.
but most days they just make me laugh.

some days i'm completely drained of energy.
but most days i run around until the sun sets.

some days i yearn for summer.
but most days i really enjoy the time with my students.

i think those kids are getting to me....

yesterday i had been talking about this one little boy - he's a 5th grader with a whole ton going on ... he's got an extreme learning disability coupled with one of the worst-managed cases of ADHD and a dad who doesn't know how to be a parent because he's too busy doing meth. his arm is in a cast from a missed bike jump, yet he was rollerblading home last week. his everything is dirty, his mouth is always moving, and he hasn't had a haircut since i met him.

in short, i really like this kid. (disclaimer: obviously i really like all my students, however, this one is such a heartbreaking case that i can't help but dwell upon it.)

since he was on my mind, naturally, i dreamed that this child had been shot. i woke up in tears, only to realize that it was, fortunately, just a dream. one that is truly indicative of my feelings that this child has been victimized in the worst way: neglect, and my own feelings of helplessness in this situation.

having this dream made me realize that there really is a fine line that teachers walk between doing what you are supposed and doing "too much." it's hard to tell the difference some days.

St. Theresa wrote something that i think is not only remarkably appropriate, but also makes me think that she and i would have been besties if she were alive today.

grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change,
the courage to change the things i can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.

i'm going to re-title this "The Teacher's Prayer."


only 2 more mondays, 3 more WRATs, 6 more DIBELS, and 14 more teaching days until summer.


this month is flying.


i'm gonna go catch it.


peace.